OMG! I want to beat her sometimes! and Charlie too.

Ok, so I would never beat my child, but seriously, she has been HORRIBLE this week. I have never seen such blatent, rotten, snotty behavior out of a 2 year old in my life. I know she is 2 and all, but come on. Time out works rarely, spankings...HA..., she could give a rats ass what her punishment is. Redirecting her to something else, just results in trouble somewhere else. She wont listen, she wont stay in bed, in fact, she climbs her gate to get out of her bedroom. I just caught her trying to sneak back into her room after sneaking out. Unfortunately for her, she was a bit too slow, but I found out her method and removed her ' escape ladder'. She is too smart for her own good. My mom payed for us to enroll her in dance class once a week. I was thinking that might help her in her abundance of energy and attitude, but its only been one week. They jury is still out on that one. I love her to pieces, but right now, I really don't like her very much.
Charlie doesn't help the situation either. He's all bark and no discipline. And he talks, and talks, and talks, and tries to reason with her and when that doesn't work...its up to me to be the bad guy. Tonight he spanked her for refusing to listen again and again, then proceeded to console her, and talk to her, and appologize to her, and blah blah blah, then he let her continue to jump on the bed, which was what got her spanked in the first place...so he pretty much undid anything that might have been accomplished by letting her know that he's a big sap and will ultimately let her do whatever she wants. Gawd hes an IDIOT! We deffinitely are not on the same page, or the same universe for that matter, as far as our parenting goes. I expect good behavior, he expects to play and leave me to clean up the discipline issues. Just like everything else in our life. Ok, but I'm not going there...that might be a realllllllly long blog.
Anyway, back to my original issue. I know everyone told me 3s are worse than 2's but I really didn't think it could be this bad...and shes not even 3! God help me!